


Rossi's Entertainment

by Jekkah



Category: Criminal Minds
Genre: Alcohol, F/M, Humor, M/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-25
Updated: 2014-10-25
Packaged: 2018-02-22 12:52:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,743
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2508542
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jekkah/pseuds/Jekkah
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Rossi gets bored at a BAU get together and decides to start pushing some folks in certain directions for his own entertainment. JJ/Hotch and Morgan/Garcia with hints of Rossi/Callahan and Reid/Cruz</p>
            </blockquote>





	Rossi's Entertainment

**Author's Note:**

> Author's Note: So, this idea started as a “Rossi pushes JJ and Hotch and Morgan and Garcia together” and quickly escalated to a bit more. The other pairings in the fic were not planned and just came along as I wrote. I actually managed to get this all done in one evening! Hope you enjoy!

Rossi glanced around his living room through slightly bleary eyes. He had the entire BAU, including Matt Cruz, over for what Garcia called a cocktail party and what he called drunken shenanigans. Unfortunately, despite being the first time that everyone on the team was single, there were not too many shenanigans occurring. 

Therefore, Rossi was bored. And when he got bored, he started to meddle. And tonight, he had his sights set on some very specific people.

Initially, he had considered making Matt Cruz his project for the evening as Cruz was fresh off a divorce. By the looks that the drunken man was shooting Reid as Reid attempted to teach him a magic trick, Rossi could easily figure out why that marriage had fallen apart. Still, to make Cruz his project would mean involving Reid and that had not ended well the last two times that he had tried.

Briefly, Rossi considered turning his skills on Kate, but the looks that she was giving him caused him to reconsider. It was almost as if she was able to read his mind, to know what he was up to. It was disconcerting, in the least, and he felt it best to leave her be.

That left the remaining four members of the BAU: Hotch, JJ, Morgan, and Garcia. Rossi licked his lips as he thought over potential plans. He nearly clapped in glee when he settled on one; well, two plans, really.

“Hey, Jayje,” he muttered in JJ's ear. 

She looked up from the drink she was pouring, her eyes glazed over. “Yeah?”

Rossi cleared his throat, tossing a look towards Kate. “Have you had a chance to properly welcome Kate to the team?”

“Do you mean 'have I kissed her yet'?” JJ asked. He waggled his eyebrows in response. She pointed at Kate and winked. “Yep. You should have gone to the bar after the Albany case.”

“Ah, I missed JJ and Kate!” Morgan shouted from across the room in fake agony. “Damn those broken water pipes!”

Reid laughed. “So, does that mean you've now kissed everyone?”

Garcia raised her hands. “I think that my kiss shouldn't count. It was a twofer with Elle.”

“A kiss is a kiss,” JJ shot back. She giggled. “But if you play your cards right, you just might get another.”

“She hasn't quite kissed everybody,” Rossi spoke up, a hint of mischief in his voice that only Kate seemed to catch onto. “She's never kissed Hotch. At least, she hasn't in front of all of us.”

Rolling his eyes, Hotch stood from the chair. “No, she hasn't. And, no, it's none of your business.” He crossed the room to pour himself another scotch. 

Rossi grinned and headed towards Garcia as Morgan moved to talk to Kate on the couch. “Hey, Kitten.”

“Mr. Italian Stallion,” Garcia snickered. “Great party.”

“Thank you.” He looked around, making sure that Morgan was listening. “So, tell me; I haven't spoken to Vincenzo yet. How did your meeting go?”

Garcia's eyes lit up. “Oh, it was amazing! He is wonderful. So bright and hard-working! And such a cutie! I think we really connected.”

Rossi smirked as Morgan rose from the couch, cutting Kate off mid-sentence. “Good. That's good.”

“Hey, Garcia, can I talk to you?” Morgan asked, jealousy in his eyes.

“Ummmm,” she hesitated, glancing at Rossi.

His kissed her temple. “Go ahead. I'll keep Kate company.” He sat down on couch, looking smug.

Kate watched him for a minute before leaning over to whisper, “I know what you're up to, David Rossi.”

“Me? What makes you think I'm up to anything?” he asked with all the innocence in the world. The twinkle in his eye, however, gave him away.

“Hotch is the only one that hasn't kissed JJ? Garcia meeting with a 'friend' of yours?” she replied. “I happen to know that Vincenzo is a shy fifteen-year-old kid that Garcia is tutoring and that JJ can't let go of a mystery, any mystery, when she's drunk. You're trying to start some entertainment.”

Rossi frowned. “I notice that you haven't said anything to any of them.”

She shrugged, her eyes flicking to Reid and Cruz in the corner of the room in what appeared to be an intense conversation. “Maybe, I'm drumming up some entertainment of my own.”

“You know, Kate,” Rossi put his arm around her shoulder and hugged her to his body, “this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship.”

CMCMCMCMCMCMCMCMCMCMCM

“Enjoying yourself?” JJ asked Hotch, leaning close to him.

“It's not a bad way to spend a Friday night,” he replied, blushing. He smiled as her vanilla perfume washed over him.

She bit her bottom lip. “I suppose not. I'm certainly glad that Rossi's place as lots of room. There's no way that I could drive home tonight.”

Hotch bobbed his head. “Me either.”

“So, why haven't you let me kiss you?” JJ questioned, diving right in.

“Why haven't you ever tried?” he countered.

She folded her arms. “I asked you first.”

Hotch moved his head down so that his lips were just outside her ear. “I've never kissed you because once I start, I won't be able to stop.”

“A-are- Are you-” JJ couched. “Are you serious?”

“Completely,” he breath out, making sure that his lips touched the top of her ear. He stood up with a self-satisfied grin.

She pivoted, letting her eyes rove over him hotly, smiling when she noticed a blush creeping up his neck the longer she look. “How drunk are you?”

Hotch started. “What?”

“How... drunk... are you?” she repeated, pressing her side into his.

“Drunk enough to flirt with you, but not so drunk that I don't know what I'm doing,” he answered honestly.

JJ smiled widely at that. She took both of their cups and set them down before grabbing his hand. She tugged on him. “Come on.”

He faltered for just a second. “Where to?”

“Well, I'm sure as hell not going to make out with you here in front of everyone.”

“You're going to make out with me?” Hotch croaked, squeezing her hand, nervously.

She placed a quick, gentle kiss on his lips. “If you do it right, you might get even more.”

Hotch pulled her out of the room. “What are we waiting for?”

CMCMCMCMCMCMCMCMCMCMCM

“Well, would you look at that?” Rossi said, arrogantly to Kate.

She rolled her eyes. “Not bad. But even I could feel the chemistry between the two of them. They needed just a little push.”

Rossi shrugged, unwilling to let her bring him down. “Maybe, but I've been trying to push them for over seven years now. It's not as easy as you'd think.”

“Clearly not.” She nodded towards Morgan and Garcia. “How do you think those two are doing?”

“Oh, he's just now getting around to asking her about Vincenzo.”

CMCMCMCMCMCMCMCMCMCMCM

“So, then she said-” Garcia stopped suddenly. “Are you even listening to me, Derek?”

“Of course!” Morgan nearly shouted. He ducked his head. “Okay, not really.”

Garcia put her hands on her hips. “I know it's not the most interesting story, but you don't have to be rude.”

He cringed. “Who's Vincenzo?”

“What? None of your business!” she shot back.

“Since when are your dates none of my business?”

Garcia flushed with anger. “Since you hid your last girlfriend from me!”

Morgan grabbed her arm when she tried to storm away. “I'm sorry. You're right.” He took his free hand and used it to play with one of her curls. “I should have told you. I just... couldn't. And I know that I have no right to pry into your love life, but I can't help it.”

“Vincenzo wasn't a date,” she admitted. She could kick herself for revealing that information after just being angry at him, but she was lost in his chocolate eyes.

“He's not?”

She shook her head, dislodging his hand from her hair. He moved it behind her neck instead. “No. He's Rossi's friend's kid. He's been having some trouble in school. He's super shy so he's an easy target. I've been teaching him some things on the computer because he's really interested in it. It seems to be helping him gain some confidence.” Garcia took a deep breath to stop from rambling. “He is a very sweet fifteen-year-old boy.”

Morgan's eyes lit up. “That's really nice of you.” He leaned down close to her. “Gar- Penelope, I don't want you going out on any more dates.”

“What?”

“I mean, I don't want you going out with anyone that isn't me,” he clarified, quickly.

Garcia's jaw dropped. “Me? You want to go out with me?”

Running his thumb over her cheek, he smiled. “That is exactly what I'm saying.”

“I don't believe this,” she gasped.

“Believe it,” Morgan whispered. “Penelope Garcia, would do me the honor of being my girlfriend?”

Garcia rose on her feet to kiss him. “Absolutely!”

Leaning down to kiss her again, Morgan stopped when he realized they had an audience. “Let's go somewhere else and 'talk'.”

“Lead me on, hot stuff!” she giggled, following him out of the room.

CMCMCMCMCMCMCMCMCMCMCM

“I really thought she'd hang onto her anger longer,” Kate commented to Rossi as they watch Morgan and Garcia hurry from the room.

“Garcia? No way. She's been waiting for this for too long,” Rossi said with a smile. He took a gander around the room to find it empty. “What happened to the boys?”

Kate laughed. “They left not long after JJ and Hotch.” Her cheeks heated up. “And based on the way that Matt was attacking Reid's neck, I don't think you want to go searching for them.”

Rossi looked at her, proudly. “It appears that all of our scheming was successful.”

“Scheming? Oh, no. We were just pushing people in the right direction.”

“What should we do now?” he asked. “All of the entertainment has gone.”

Raising a single eyebrow, she gave him a pointed look. “I find it hard to believe that you don't have anything else for us to do.”

Rossi ducked his head. “Well, there is a hot tub out back.”

“I don't have a suit,” Kate informed him.

“That's okay,” he assured her, pulling her up from the couch. “I wasn't planning on wearing one.”

Chuckling as they grabbed a bottle of vodka on their way out the door, Kate said, “You know, I really think I'm going to like these parties of yours.”

 

END


End file.
